Fears, Questions and His Will

How do you know when you are following God's direction? This is the question I have been asking. Over the last several years I've been actively seeking His will for me. More than any other time in my life, I've been diligently and persistently seeking Him and seeking His will. The journey has been hard but I wouldn't trade it!
Along the way God has given me glimpses of where He is leading. After getting one of these glimpses, I expanded the vision and made a picture of what I thought it would be. Then that door closed. This was a very painful and hard thing to experience. But it forced me to seek, pray and slowly explore other options. I went back to the previous glimpse and said, "OK God, when, where, how? You lead me." And He has been. In fact, He has been quite clear about what I was NOT to do. So, sticking with my door theme, He closed a couple more doors helping to narrow the choices.
But, now that I'm close to opening this new door, I'm afraid. What if I haven't been hearing Him right? What if I haven't waited long enough? Questions, doubts, fears. But this door has not closed. Of the door options I've laid before Him, this one has remained open and at times has had His light shining on it. So why am I so afraid to step through it?


A friend sent me this verse “You can enter God’s Kingdom only through the narrow gate. The highway to hell is broad, and its gate is wide for the many who choose that way. ¹⁴ But the gateway to life is very narrow and the road is difficult, and only a few ever find it." Matthew 7:13-14
I wonder if there is something to this seeking and finding thing being difficult that is affirming of being on the right path. It seems that if something is very easy i.e. the broad way, that may lead to a place I really do not want to go.


I know I've said this before, but I continue to struggle with why the Christian path seems to be so difficult. Why was I led to believe that if you just believe in Jesus and accept Him as your Savior it would be smooth sailing after that. That is a false belief and is not backed up in any way by scripture. In fact, scriptures are filled with things like the above verse and "take up your cross daily and follow Me" type stuff. (like my grammar?:))  So you would think those false ideas wouldn't abound, but they do. Or maybe it abounds in our western culture and not so much in other places, where being a Christian means your life is in danger.


So, I struggle and worry and fret for awhile, but then He reminds me I don't need to figure it out...
"Come to me all you who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest." 
He has given me His Spirit and lives in me and I don't need to worry because I can trust His heart for me. He'll close the doors and open the ones I need to go in. I can depend on Him. These are the scriptures He as spoken to me over the last several months:
"Ask and you will receive, seek and you will find, knock and the door will be opened." Luke 11:9 
 "Seek His will in all you do and He will show you which path to take." Prov. 3:6
 "Who are those who fear the Lord? He will show them the path they should choose." Psalm 26:12 
"For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases Him." Phil 2:13 
The secret to being content in all situations: For I can do everything through Christ who gives me strength." Phil 4:12-13
"I have chosen you and will not throw you away. Don't be afraid, for I am with you. Don't be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand." Isaiah 41:9-10
"I will lead blind Israel down a new path, guiding them along an unfamiliar way.  I will brighten the darkness before them and smooth out the road ahead of them. Yes, I will indeed do these things; I will not forsake them." Isaiah 42:16
"I am the Lord your God who teaches you what is good for you and leads you along the paths you should follow." Isaiah 48:17


Well, it's amazing what a little looking back will do for your soul. :) I suddenly don't feel so unsure. He is with me and that's enough to calm me and assure me. 


Till next time....
and the greatest of these is love